Our Babies

Our Babies
Luke and Claire

"Welcome to Holland"


By Emily Perl Kingsley, 1987. All rights reserved.


I am often asked to describe the experience of raising a child with a disability - to try to help people who have not shared that unique experience to understand it, to imagine how it would feel. It's like this......

When you're going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation trip - to Italy. You buy a bunch of guide books and make your wonderful plans. The Coliseum. The Michelangelo David. The gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It's all very exciting.

After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, "Welcome to Holland."

"Holland?!?" you say. "What do you mean Holland?? I signed up for Italy! I'm supposed to be in Italy. All my life I've dreamed of going to Italy."

But there's been a change in the flight plan. They've landed in Holland and there you must stay.

The important thing is that they haven't taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine and disease. It's just a different place.

So you must go out and buy new guide books. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met.

It's just a different place. It's slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you've been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around.... and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills....and Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts.

But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy... and they're all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say "Yes, that's where I was supposed to go. That's what I had planned."

And the pain of that will never, ever, ever, ever go away...because the loss of that dream is a very very significant loss. But...if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things ... about Holland.

Monday, March 12, 2012

My little baby...



My little baby boy is all grown up! Or, at least I think so considering that I'm about to have Baby Claire in the morning. Luke has been such a help lately around the house since I'm too puffy to get around as much as I usually do. His latest interest is BabyFirst TV. For those of you without kids - let me tell you - it is MAGICAL!!! Although the characters are a wee bit creepy, they are not nearly as scary as Teletubbies or as obnoxious as Barney. Before you know it, you'll be singing along to the songs too....The only ones of you judging me right now are those of you without kiddos of your own!


 

Not only does Luke enjoy restful time watching tv with me, but he is VERY good at feeding himself dinner. Notice that he is eating spaghetti in that second picture, and there is actually spaghetti in the bowl and in his mouth - not all over the highchair. This is a major accomplishment in our lives, and it wouldn't have happened so quickly without his saintly teachers who work on this each and every day. They are also a bit more ambitious that we are and only use open cups for drinking...we'll get there here at home.



Luke even likes to help with chores around the house. I was trying to clean up before Claire's arrival, and Luke wanted to do his part. He disappeared from the kitchen one afternoon, and I found him in the bedroom taking care of the laundry. Unfortunately, he is kind of like his daddy and only gets what is his, but hey, it is a step in the right direction!

 

Finally, there I am on my last night of Claire's pregnancy! Some days I felt like I was pregnant for 27 years, and other days I feel like we were just finding out. I've been ridiculously sentimental that Luke isn't going to be my baby anymore, so we've been celebrating all of our "lasts" as a family of three. Every time we go to do something, I say, "Oh, Patrick, aren't you sad...this is the last time that just the three of us will....." Nope. He isn't sad. Men. They never understand. Here is our last picture of our little family of three. Stay tuned for our the next blog where baby Claire joins the family!!!



1 comment:

  1. Oh, that is so sweet! I still look at pictures of just my mom, dad, and I during the first year and a half before my two siblings came along. I used to ask my mom to tell me stories about adventures with the "three" of us because it really is special and only for a short time for some families. I love being the oldest, and Luke will, too! Congrats again. Thanks for sharing.

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