Perspectives from Holland: What a busy week!

"Welcome to Holland"

I am often asked to describe the experience of raising a child with a disability - to try to help people who have not shared that unique experience to understand it, to imagine how it would feel. It's like this......

When you're going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation trip - to Italy. You buy a bunch of guide books and make your wonderful plans. The Coliseum. The Michelangelo David. The gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It's all very exciting.

After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, "Welcome to Holland."

"Holland?!?" you say. "What do you mean Holland?? I signed up for Italy! I'm supposed to be in Italy. All my life I've dreamed of going to Italy."

But there's been a change in the flight plan. They've landed in Holland and there you must stay.

The important thing is that they haven't taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine and disease. It's just a different place.

So you must go out and buy new guide books. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met.

It's just a different place. It's slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you've been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around.... and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills....and Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts.

But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy... and they're all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say "Yes, that's where I was supposed to go. That's what I had planned."

And the pain of that will never, ever, ever, ever go away...because the loss of that dream is a very very significant loss. But...if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things ... about Holland.

Sunday, August 12, 2012

What a busy week!

For the past two weeks Patrick thought he might be going to Korea for work. It was on again, off again, and it was difficult to get dates pinned down. Finally, this Thursday he got his airplane tickets...to leave yesterday morning. Not a big deal...except that I am leaving in the morning for a conference in Washington D.C. Thankfully, Grandma just arrived to save the day! Here's what all went on during our week of chaos:

Daddy got some extra cuddle time with Claire Bear before he left. I promise she normally loves it despite her pained look in this picture.

Luke has been working really hard to help Claire with her tummy time. He turns on his teddy bear, Scout, so Claire can listen to the music and watch the lights on his belly; however, the television distracted Luke from his brotherly responsibility.

You can't see me.....

If I keep laying really still, maybe Luke will leave us alone. Daddy is cuddling me!!!

How you doin'?

Yep, I'm as awesome as I look!

Claire got her first bites of cereal!!! She wasn't quite sure what to think the first time we tried it.

Oooohhhh!!! That second bit was yummier than the first!

Now that Luke is in his big boy bed, Ralphie likes to help with wake-up time. Sophie decided to help out today as well, but she was too scared to get her picture taken.

Whew! That was a great nap! But now I'm hungry....

I think I'll make some muffins!

Yes, I am just like my daddy, and I love to cook! These were banana-chocolate chip muffins, and they were delicious!

Luke wasn't the only hungry one. Good thing he finally gave up sitting in his high chair for most meals and switched to his booster seat at the grown-up table.