Our Babies

Our Babies
Luke and Claire

"Welcome to Holland"


By Emily Perl Kingsley, 1987. All rights reserved.


I am often asked to describe the experience of raising a child with a disability - to try to help people who have not shared that unique experience to understand it, to imagine how it would feel. It's like this......

When you're going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation trip - to Italy. You buy a bunch of guide books and make your wonderful plans. The Coliseum. The Michelangelo David. The gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It's all very exciting.

After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, "Welcome to Holland."

"Holland?!?" you say. "What do you mean Holland?? I signed up for Italy! I'm supposed to be in Italy. All my life I've dreamed of going to Italy."

But there's been a change in the flight plan. They've landed in Holland and there you must stay.

The important thing is that they haven't taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine and disease. It's just a different place.

So you must go out and buy new guide books. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met.

It's just a different place. It's slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you've been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around.... and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills....and Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts.

But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy... and they're all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say "Yes, that's where I was supposed to go. That's what I had planned."

And the pain of that will never, ever, ever, ever go away...because the loss of that dream is a very very significant loss. But...if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things ... about Holland.

Sunday, February 5, 2012

Well, this past week has been interesting to say the least. On Wedensday, Luke's daycare called us to say that he had a 102 temp and that he had to go home. I was on my way home to go run around the neighborhood so that worked out. I took the booger to the Quickcare place close to our house. He had pneumonia and we went to the ER. LUCKILY his O2 levels were good, so we were sent home with a satchel full of meds with the promise that we would see the doc in the morning. Deal! So we went and he was happy, if not a bit wheezy/coughy. Yes, I just made up a word. Deal with it. The clinic had two pulse/oxygen monitors, one was broken and the other was all over the place. The doc was a wuss and kept us waiting for over an hour trying to figure out if she was going to send us to the hospital. The nurses were fighting for us not to go since Luke was happy and hyper. She sent us home finally and we had to come back the next day. That evening, Melissa asked me to rub her back so she could pop it. It seems to be getting tighter as she gets close to her due date. So she cracks the ever living crap out it and is satisfied. Sometime that night she whacks me in the arm to wake me up. Her back is killing her and she goes to the ER. I stay at home so Luke can sleep. She calls me 2 hours later to come get her, they are giving her a shot and Claire is fine. So that works out. The next morning, Melissa can barely move because of her back but she has to take Luke to the doc. She again fights with the doc to send us home and wins. Both times she told the doc that we can go home peacefully, or the doc can try to send us to the hospital and have a major scene on her hands. In case you didn't know, my wife is part Honey Badger, just saying. Any-hoo, so that was our week. And I'm the only two legged person in my house that hasn't gone to the ER! Hell, even the dogs went to the vet for shots, so there you go. If this post is a bit choppy, it's because I typed it out on our iPad. Not too bad either!

Sunday, January 22, 2012

Claire's Room

I think Luke is finally beginning to realize that the world doesn't only revolve around him. Now, I know this may seem like a shock, but he is going to have to learn that sometimes Mommy and Daddy will have to take care of Claire before catering to his every need. Today, we finally hung up the artwork that I had diligently been working on for several days. Watch out HGTV....the room actually kind of matches! Who would have ever thought I had it in me?!? Luke wasn't quite sure what to make of everything, nor could he understand why the pictures took priority over another dish of cheese its. Luckily, he found a basket of baby toys, and the world seemed right again. We'll see what happens when Claire thinks it is her turn with the toys....

Here are some pics (sorry they aren't the greatest...silly iphone camera):







Tuesday, January 3, 2012

Top 5 2011 Highlights

 Top 5 highlights of 2011 included:
1. Watching Luke progress. It's so easy to take developmental milestones for granted, but watching the effort Luke puts in to each skill he learns makes us celebrate everything...yes, everything...he claps if he farts.

2. Finding out we were pregnant....Luke would have so much fun with a sibling. Reference item #1...new skills include buidling up the strength to beat up a sibling.

3. Finding out that sibling is a GIRL!!! Luckily I didn't hurt myself permanently when I almost fell off the table when the nurse told me.

4. No deployments!!!!!! Item #2 wouldn't have been otherwise possible.

5. Melissa's promotion at work. Note line item #3 - girls are expensive. Now we can afford one. Plus, now that her Master's is done she has time to shop.

We can't wait for everything that 2012 will bring, especially meeting baby Claire in March!

Christmas 2011






Our house looks like Toys R Us now that Christmas is over! Luke throroughly enjoyed being spoiled rotten by his grandparents, aunts, and uncles. He earned it though after all the hard work he put in this year at speech and occupational therapy.

Christmas started wtih a LONG drive to Topeka since Claire decided to kick mommy's bladder the ENTIRE way. After 543,343,204 stops, we finally made it.....only for Melissa to get the flu a few hours later. Despite being sick, we still had a great time with Grandpa and Grandma Malone. Theresa and Kirwin came over and we finally got to see their new book, and we even got autographed copies. Mike made it back from D.C. where he was visiting his friend, Lisa and he and Luke were best friends as usual. The highlight gift from Grandpa and Grandma was a new keyboard to jam on.

Christmas morning we headed down to Wichita to see Grandpa and Grandma Godinez. Aunt Tricia, Aunt Becky, and Cousin Maddie all came over and we had a great Christmas. The highlight gift was Luke's new Harley; however, it has to stay in Wichita until Grandma visits next time because the car was packed to the max. We had so much fun that Luke just couldn't stay awake for one more gift and finally crashed in the middle of the afternoon.

We were bound and determined not to get into trouble when Luke finally went back to school after break. Despite a relaxing week at home, we finally managed to get some sort of routine back. Luke's first day back at school ended with an excellent report that he worked extra hard, ate with his spoon, kept his glasses on, and an extra long therapy session....looks like he wants to stay on Santa's good list another year!

Tuesday, December 13, 2011

When my son is a druggie...

...You can reference the following pictures.



In case you are actually wondering what's going on, we are administering a breathing treatment with an anti-inflammatory drug, NOT using some sort of baby water bong!  Not that you could tell that he wasn't stoned out of his mind in the next picture.

TOKE, TOKE, PASS MAN!  Messing up the rotation!

And last, but certaintly not least, is my Christmas present for my lovely bride.  I think she needs to learn how to defend herself in our dangerous neighborhood.  Some would even call it "Tha Hood!"  Tell me what you think.

Pink even!


Friday, December 2, 2011

Random Stuff


Hello!  I know, I know, it's been a while, but with Luke in the hospital with pneumonia, Thanksgiving, Melissa being out of town, there just never seemed to be a good time to do a blog!  Well, we saw something funny today that Luke was doing, so we figured now would be a good time to post.

First things first!  It turns out that Luke has an addiction.  It's serious.  It really begins with our addiction.  You see, Melissa and I feel as though we need to ensure the local Starbucks stays in business...single handedly!  Well, once or twice we have gotten their berry coffee cake.  If you haven't tried it, it's great.  The real problem is, Luke thinks so too.  So now, we can't even go through the drive thru because he KNOWS that's where we get the coffee cake and demands his own!  It's an issue we are working through.



The next video we have is one from him using his walker at the hospital.  You can tell he was feeling SOOOO much better than he had a few days before that.  He really loves to stay mobile!




The last one we have is from tonight.  Luke loves Ralphie and he wishes he was stronger so that they could really play together, but since he isn't we get to help them interact.  Ralphie loves his blue rubber frisbee, so all he wants is someone to throw it for him!  Like I said before, we help them...




In the mean time, Luke is getting much stronger since we've had him on his anti-inflammatory that we got at the hospital.  We are controlling his allergies a lot better and all in all he is MUCH more energetic and strong.  He is even MORE interactive than he was before we went to the hospital!  It's kind of like Donkey from Shrek:  "It's not getting him to talk that's the trick...IT'S GETTING HIM TO SHUT UP!"

Sunday, October 23, 2011

Halloween Extravaganza Part 1

Well, Grandma Godinez has come and gone.  She came up for the week while Melissa was gone all week and I was gone the beginning of the week.  She got to snuggle with the Little One the whole time!  She loves to play with Luke on account that he is just about the happiest kid ever.  Right up until Grandma leaves, then he becomes a bit of a butt again.

BUT, this is the Halloween Extravaganza Part 1!  We have had a few ghoulish like events the last few weeks that we wanted to share with you guys.  The first one reveals Luke's costume for Halloween....COOKIE MONSTER!




Well, it seems that the costume choice was ideal, since it turns out that Luke LOVES Halloween cookies!  This one is about 5 minutes long, but worth the wait!




Now, of course Luke is a mess from all of that frosting and sprinkles.  So, we, as National Parent of the Year Award 2011 nominees should do, decide that there is only one good way to clean our son after he tore through the cookie!




So there you go.  Luke seems to love Halloween.  So go to www.beenbooed.com and go "Boo" your friends!