Our Babies

Our Babies
Luke and Claire

"Welcome to Holland"


By Emily Perl Kingsley, 1987. All rights reserved.


I am often asked to describe the experience of raising a child with a disability - to try to help people who have not shared that unique experience to understand it, to imagine how it would feel. It's like this......

When you're going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation trip - to Italy. You buy a bunch of guide books and make your wonderful plans. The Coliseum. The Michelangelo David. The gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It's all very exciting.

After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, "Welcome to Holland."

"Holland?!?" you say. "What do you mean Holland?? I signed up for Italy! I'm supposed to be in Italy. All my life I've dreamed of going to Italy."

But there's been a change in the flight plan. They've landed in Holland and there you must stay.

The important thing is that they haven't taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine and disease. It's just a different place.

So you must go out and buy new guide books. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met.

It's just a different place. It's slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you've been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around.... and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills....and Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts.

But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy... and they're all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say "Yes, that's where I was supposed to go. That's what I had planned."

And the pain of that will never, ever, ever, ever go away...because the loss of that dream is a very very significant loss. But...if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things ... about Holland.

Wednesday, May 30, 2012

There's No Place Like Home

You may have been wondering where the heck we have been the past few weeks, so sorry for the disappearing act. Blame it partially on a broken computer, but more importantly, our trip to Kansas!!! Nothing, and I do mean NOTHING is better than getting to be back at home for more than a few days. Our social calendar was jam-packed!!

First, we spent the weekend in Topeka/Lawrence to celebrate baby brother's graduation from KU. Hard to believe that little Mikey is all grown up. Poor schmuck has to enter the real world now. Guess it isn't really that bad though. Here are Kim, Erin, and I (Sigma Kappa girls) gathered for a reunion. You know you are old when conversation has shifted to house buying, jobs, and babies.

Then it was time to take baby brother out on the town to celebrate graduation. We hit up our old stomping grounds...QUINTON'S (Said in a loud yell for any of you non-KU people)....Louise's Downtown.....The Wheel. Patrick and I may be old, but we closed down the bars and ended the night with pizza just like old times. Thankfully, Grandma Malone kept the kiddos so we could re-live our college days.


The weekend was even more perfect because the old roomies reunited!!!! Blair and Ashley were both in town for another friend's bachelorette party. Even though it was a short visit, it was so good to see each other.

 The next day was graduation. Thankfully, the weather was about as perfect as we were going to get. We started the day at Mike's friends house with some mimosas (Yes, we had to explain to mom and dad what these were). Here are the boys trying to look graduate-like.

Patrick and I were fortunate to live with some of our best friends during college, friends we still have today all of these years later. Mike was equally as lucky to live with some awesome guys the past few years.

Notice that Luke looks scared in this picture. Mike is standing on a slope and had been drinking. Luke is no fool....luckily, this ended well.

Luke couldn't wait to see Crazy Uncle Mike walk down the hill for graduation, a KU tradition. There were lots of people to watch, dogs to pet, and grass to roll around in during the wait.

Grandma Malone and Auntie Theresa took Claire and sat in the shade....
 
Until the grads made it down the hill! Somehow we managed to find them and get this picture. Mike, this one belongs in a frame.

After the graduation festivities dad took the whole family out to lunch at a Mexican restaurant. The food was great, but the wait was long. We intended to go all over campus to get some shots of the three KU grads together, but the babies were getting tired. We did manage to get this one though in front of the main KU sign.

We spent the next day shopping in Lawrence, and it was an absolutely BEAUTIFUL day!!! One thing you don't appreciate about Lawrence when you live there in college are the amazing parks. Luke and Daddy had a great time playing together.

Luke's new favorite thing is to go down slides. It is a little difficult since he can't climb the ladders himself, so either Patrick or I get a good arm workout lifting him up over...and over....and over...

During our visit to Wichita we thought Luke might like a day at the zoo. He loved the petting zoo, but the goats were a little scary at first.

We think Luke liked the statues of the animals just as much as the real thing, which was fine with us because it made getting a good picture much easier.

Even when animals were far away, Luke enjoyed watching them.

We ended the week having Claire's baptism at St. Thomas, the church where we both grew up, got married, and had Luke baptized. We asked Ashley and Anthony, Melissa's college room mate and her husband, two of our best friends to be the godparents. Here are Luke and Stella, their little girl, getting ready together.

At the baptism...


Godparents (Ashley and Anthony Biondi)

And the Godinez family...

 And the Malone family...
 Great-uncle Larry and Great-aunt Mary Malone

Old roomies and kiddos together!

Daddy taking care of his worn out baby girl.


Then it was time to go back to Louisiana. Both kiddos were excellent little travel buddies. Luke loved to act like a goofball making faces and dancing. We watched The Muppet Movie twice on both trips, and he was a happy camper.

Claire used the trip to catch up on her sleep. She was exhausted from meeting all the family for the first time.

Home sweet home.

This is like two blogs in one! Right after we made it back to Louisiana, Jimmy, Katie, and their new little girl, Piper, came to visit for Memorial Day weekend. The weather was beautiful, so we packed the kiddos and headed to the lake.


Piper and Claire are only a few weeks apart, so they spent lots of time on the playmat together. Luke just watched them, wishing they were older to run around and play. Notice the interesting way Luke likes to wear his pajamas. We're just now getting into the "I like to take off my clothes" phase.

This is one of those pictures that Claire is going to hate Patrick and I for later in life. Doesn't she look like a little elf in this outfit?? I got this little outfit before I had Luke, and it just cracks me up. Normally she is decked out in head to toe pink, but the green was a nice change of pace....not to mention the kooky hat :) Embarrassing senior picture?? I think so!
Thanks to everyone who made the time to visit with us in Lawrence and helped celebrate Claire's baptism in Wichita. Until next time...

Monday, May 7, 2012

When Daddy Is Away...

We all like to play!!

 Several friends had posted on facebook how much fun they had at Disney on Ice - Toy Story 3, and we didn't want to miss out on the fun. Despite Patrick being in North Carolina for an air show, the kiddos and I loaded into the car and away we went!



We had to sit in accessible seating since I had the double stroller and no one to help me, but it actually worked out great because we were right on the edge of the balcony. Before we got there I was afraid someone with a giant head would sit in front of Luke and block his views, but no problem!



 Luke even wore his glasses the entire time so he could see. He LOVED the show. He danced and danced and danced some more. In fact, he was cracking up the security guard sitting right behind us. Baby Claire was very good, too. She had her afternoon bottle and slept soundly in her stroller so Luke and I could enjoy the show together.


When Claire is awake Luke plays very nicely with her. Notice that she still has two eyes and no patch! We're still working on the fact that Luke's fingers don't need to point out that she is awake. This might take us some time to learn. :) Claire loves to watch her big brother! Sometimes when she is crying he puts his head on her tummy and it quiets her down.




The weather on Sunday was beautiful, so Luke and I spent the afternoon outside. We played on the swing....in the pool....and with play doh! 
 
 Baby Claire relaxed in the indoor swing because she didn't feel like getting a tan quite yet.

Daddy will be home soon!!!

Thursday, April 26, 2012

As promised

As promised, I have been diligent about taking pictures of Claire since she was feeling neglected. There is one distinct trend in these pictures...can you tell baby girl LOVES to sleep?!?! It doesn't matter if it is in the swing....on mommy....or on daddy....she loves her rest. I would take more pictures of her when she is awake, but you try thinking of getting the camera out with a 6-week-old and 2-year-old!






While Claire was sleeping, Anderson and Callie came over to play! The kiddos played so nicely together. We played on the swings, ate snack, and even braved play-doh.  We'll mark it as a successful playdate since I didn't have to dig play-doh out of anyone's teeth!


Monday, April 23, 2012

Second Child Syndrome

Dear Claire,

Your dad and I really do love you. When you grow up and question why there are 1,000,000,000 pictures of Luke from each day of his life and only 1 per month for you, please understand it is not because we didn't love you. I will simply blame it on the fact that you are the second child. You are very cute, and do deserve just as many pictures, so we promise to work on that....

Here you are enjoying some exercise time while Luke was at school. I may not have many pictures, but I at least look out for your well-being and only put you on the floor when your brother won't step on your face. You'll thank me someday.





After we picked up your brother from school, you were sound asleep, and I just couldn't bear to bother you.


So Luke ate some dinner....



 And practiced walking around the house....


And watched Ellen.... Yes, this a ritual each day at our house.


When Claire finally woke up from her nap, I thought it was a brilliant idea to teach Luke to help his sister. So, the three of us filled up the baby tub, and Luke helped give Claire a bath!! Luke and I managed to stay in our original outfits, Claire actually got clean, and the carpet didn't get ruined. We're not sure what Claire thought, but just like with the lack of pictures - she'll forgive us someday.