Our Babies

Our Babies
Luke and Claire

"Welcome to Holland"

By Emily Perl Kingsley, 1987. All rights reserved.


I am often asked to describe the experience of raising a child with a disability - to try to help people who have not shared that unique experience to understand it, to imagine how it would feel. It's like this......

When you're going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation trip - to Italy. You buy a bunch of guide books and make your wonderful plans. The Coliseum. The Michelangelo David. The gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It's all very exciting.

After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, "Welcome to Holland."

"Holland?!?" you say. "What do you mean Holland?? I signed up for Italy! I'm supposed to be in Italy. All my life I've dreamed of going to Italy."

But there's been a change in the flight plan. They've landed in Holland and there you must stay.

The important thing is that they haven't taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine and disease. It's just a different place.

So you must go out and buy new guide books. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met.

It's just a different place. It's slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you've been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around.... and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills....and Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts.

But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy... and they're all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say "Yes, that's where I was supposed to go. That's what I had planned."

And the pain of that will never, ever, ever, ever go away...because the loss of that dream is a very very significant loss. But...if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things ... about Holland.

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Crazy Uncle Mike





Everyone has at least one crazy uncle. Or, if you are like Patrick and I, you have several :) Luke is lucky to have Crazy Uncle Mike. Even before Luke was born, Mike nicknamed him "Pterodactyl" and couldn't wait to have a little nephew. We thought it was so sweet until Mike spotted our baby carrier and asked if he could put Luke in it and go to the bars and pick up girls. Oh, to be 21 again. Speaking of that - Mom, Dad, and I are getting ready to head to the casino for a bit and Mike gets to stay home with Luke since Patrick is at work. It's his last day of being underage, so we have to make the most of our free babysitter while we can! Wish us luck at the casino...and wish Luke luck staying at home with Crazy Uncle Mike.

2 comments:

  1. The Carter'sJune 3, 2010 at 9:34 AM

    Looks like Luke adores Uncle Mike though, craziness & all:) I hope you won some money & enjoyed your night out!!!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Crazy Uncle MikeJune 5, 2010 at 10:17 AM

    It was great to finally meet Pterodactyl...in person! I had a great time in Louisiana. See you in a couple weeks!

    ReplyDelete

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