Our Babies

Our Babies
Luke and Claire

"Welcome to Holland"

By Emily Perl Kingsley, 1987. All rights reserved.


I am often asked to describe the experience of raising a child with a disability - to try to help people who have not shared that unique experience to understand it, to imagine how it would feel. It's like this......

When you're going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation trip - to Italy. You buy a bunch of guide books and make your wonderful plans. The Coliseum. The Michelangelo David. The gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It's all very exciting.

After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, "Welcome to Holland."

"Holland?!?" you say. "What do you mean Holland?? I signed up for Italy! I'm supposed to be in Italy. All my life I've dreamed of going to Italy."

But there's been a change in the flight plan. They've landed in Holland and there you must stay.

The important thing is that they haven't taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine and disease. It's just a different place.

So you must go out and buy new guide books. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met.

It's just a different place. It's slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you've been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around.... and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills....and Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts.

But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy... and they're all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say "Yes, that's where I was supposed to go. That's what I had planned."

And the pain of that will never, ever, ever, ever go away...because the loss of that dream is a very very significant loss. But...if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things ... about Holland.

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

Big Day!

It's looking like we're going to meet our Mother's Day goal a few days early! When I got to the hospital today, my OB, Dr. Kinder had stopped by to check in on Luke (and do a little snip snip). On his way out the door, he casually mentioned the tentative homecoming plan that he had discussed with Luke's NICU doctor. The second he left I tracked down Luke's doctor to confirm the plan, and although he can't guarantee Thursday, it is looking pretty likely that the little dude will come home then. The doc thinks that one more day of observation and strong eating is going to earn Luke a "Get out of Jail" card!!! Tomorrow morning Patrick and I will take the NICU discharge class that all parents have to take, and we'll keep our fingers crossed for a Thursday homecoming!!

That wasn't all today....

This afternoon Luke received a visit from Fr. Joe, our parish priest. He told us the story of how when he was born in India, there wasn't very good medical care and the person who delivered him thought he was going to die because he wasn't breathing very well. While his dad was outside mourning the loss of his son and building a coffin, Fr. Joe miraculously started breathing better. When he was growing up, people in his town always told him the story of how he came back to life to be with his parents. After he finished the story, Father gave Luke a special blessing for him and all other sick babies who just need a little extra help for a healthy life.

10 comments:

  1. AnonymousMay 4, 2010 at 6:24 PM

    That is awesome!!!!! So glad to hear the great news!! Will continue to keep the little guy in our prayers for a happy homecoming on Thursday.=)

    Blessings,
    Stephanie and 'Doc'

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  2. Stacy RomanMay 4, 2010 at 6:42 PM

    How wonderful!!!! Yay for you and yay for Luke!!! Happy Mother's Day indeed! :)

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  3. LisaMay 4, 2010 at 7:31 PM

    WHAT?! THURSDAY?!?!? That is such awesome news!!! So excited for you guys, I can't think of a better Mothers' Day gift than that - way to go Luke!!! I guess that Patrick has a lot to live up to now with his gift for you, Melissa! lol! :)

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  4. Ronnie and SuziMay 4, 2010 at 8:19 PM

    PURE AWESOMENESS!!!! :)

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  5. MariaMay 4, 2010 at 9:12 PM

    Great news and a great Mother's Day gift for you!

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  6. Laura StirtonMay 4, 2010 at 10:08 PM

    Yea! So exciting! What a wonderful Mother's Day present!

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  7. ~* N *~May 5, 2010 at 9:40 AM

    Congratulations! I'm so excited for you guys that you get to take him home TOMORROW! Wow!

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  8. UnknownMay 5, 2010 at 10:26 AM

    You have 17 of us to cheer your homecoming, Baby Luke! We are all thrilled for the entire family! We are sure that the first day home is going to be an exciting one. Words will not fully explain how special that one will be!

    Best wishes from Mrs. Kilgore & Parenting Class Girls

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  9. UnknownMay 5, 2010 at 10:56 AM

    Better get a GREAT night sleep tonight, even though it will be hard, it may be the last for the next 18 + years ;) Sooooo happy to hear the wonderful news. Keep on rocking on Lukie poo! Much love from Auntie Blair!

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  10. UnknownMay 5, 2010 at 11:09 AM

    Woo-hoo! What wonderful news! Alright, Luke! Pretty close to Cinco de Mayo there, kiddo...guess you had to split between that and Mothers' Day ;-)

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